The institution of higher learning has been keeping me away from the ever-so-important task of updating my site; of giving my loyal audience (all three of you) the Soulsmiles goods, the lowdown in the motown, the shanninigans of michiganinans. Ok so maybe that last one didn't work so well. But all of this time spent studying has paid off. I am pulling A's in both my classes, and I am somewhat enjoying the experience. Probably the best part of my school day is observing the cast of characters in my classes...
Classmate Chronicles
And now, the award for Worst Social Skills in the History of ALL History. I consider myself a fairly nice person, when someone talks to me, engages in conversation, I respond courteously as one should. But man has that gotten me into a predicament. As I'm leaving class one day, minding my own business as I do, a woman starts talking to me, innocently saying, "Gotta go pick up the kids." I respond, "oh yeah?" First mistake. Why? Why did I have to respond? Why couldn't I have just ignored her, pretended that I didn't hear anything?!
As we continue our exit from class she informs me that it's her kids birthday and she's having a party for him. I don't remember the rest of the conversation because I was stuck on why this woman would think I cared about her kids birthday party. I don't know her, I don't know her kids, I don't even know her goddamn name. I had never spoken one word to her.
Oh, it gets better! The following week, as I'm walking to class, I notice she's looking at me. I put my head down, farther than usual I might add, in hopes of not making eye contact or giving her any indication that I know she's there. But it doesn't matter, no, not one bit. She says, "Excuse me?" beckoning me over. I was a bit caught off guard because her voice is that of a man, and not just any man but the fucking Marlboro Man.
I thought maybe she wanted to talk about the notes, the test, class stuff, which would be the normal thing to discuss with someone you don't know in one of your classes. But no, the Marlboro ManLady says, "My kids birthday party was really great. I made goodie bags blah blah blah. We played games blah blah blah." As I indicated earlier, I'm a nice person, I appeared to be interested, nodding my head, smiling, adding in the occasional "cool" or "oh yeah?" This was mistake number two, never engage in conversation with crazy people! Remember, I have no idea who this lady is. We had a brief "in-passing" conversation about her kids birthday party while leaving class, that's it!
To make matters worse, she's telling me about her and her husbands test for the Coast Guard. And she's speaking to me as if I know about the Coast Guard and the tests they take, because what normal person doesn't know all about the goddamn Coast Guard, right? At this point I realize I am in over my head. I start positioning my body in such a manner as to indicate I want to go to class, this lady just keeps on blabbing. She stands up, gathers her stuff, and now I must endure the walk to class with her, hearing all about her Coast Guard test. I was praying to the powers that be that she wouldn't follow me to my seat, and she didn't.
But! The week after that incident, as I now like to refer to it, there was another one, this time it was worse. This time she got up off the bench and walked directly in my path, as if to hinder any further progression. Are you hearing me? The Marlboro ManLady got UP OFF THE BENCH, and hunted me down! I'm the prey of a lunatic! She starts talking about her kids again. There is no "hi, how are you?" She says, "Excuse me, my kids blah blah blah, the Coast Guard blah blah blah blah."
Should I be scared? I feel scared. What if all the things she's telling me are lies. She says she's in the Coast Guard but she looks like someone the Coast Guard would rescue, not hire. I get to class early now. If I do see her I pull my cellphone out of my pocket and pretend to be on the phone.

Das about all the update I got for you today. It was a long story though, so it counts! Stay tuned for more Classmate Chronicles. I have more for you, though not as in depth as Marlboro ManLady. I'm headed up north with my camera for the weekend, hopefully I'll get some nice fall foliage pictures for you. I can't believe I just said foliage!