Part 3 - So so So
What happens when
one family of secrets
meets another
family of secrets?
Me.
So so shy.
So so scared.
So so sensitive.
So so
secretive.
Shhhh
shhheee
so silent
so silenced
so
sit there and think about what you've done.
A thinkin' I went
all up and down that shit
that shhhhit.
Took the shh's
the shhhit
to heart
and thought
thought hard I did
thought
am I doing this right?
Cause I'm so
angry.
I'm a mad kid
a distrustful adult.
I'm a sad kid
a depressed adult.
I'm a fat kid
an overeating adult.
I'm a gay kid
a queer soft butch adult.
I'm a thinking kid
a thinking adult.
My story is
thinking
still always thinking.
Found a form
I could work with.
A medium of symbols
of secrets
stitches crocheted
with yarn sentences
tucked in paragraphs and pieces.
Secrets laid out
with careful encoding -
the texture
the shape
the punctuation
the line breaks
the rhythm
the pace
the voice.
The secrets
taking shape
like a backpack of knots
a receptacle of suffering
a telling of secrets.
February 24, 2006